Mighty Girl
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contact: maggie at mightygirl dot net

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12.24.03 TRY SOMETHING NEW EVERY DAY
I just washed down a Pepto Bismol tablet with champagne.

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12.24.03 WINTER WONDERLAND
"We'll have lots of fun with Mr. Snowman" sounds like a euphemism.

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12.23.03 NIGHTMARE FAIRIES
So, according to this article, PETA has decided to hand out fliers to little kids coming out of the Nutcracker. The fliers "include a color drawing of a woman plunging a large bloody knife into the belly of a terrified rabbit. The fliers urge kids to 'ask your mommy how many dead animals she killed to make her fur clothes.'"

As long as PETA is educating the public on how animals have similar feelings and instincts to humans, perhaps they should pause and consider how a mother bear reacts when someone threatens her cubs.

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12.23.03 WALKING FASTER
It is raining heavily. This man is wearing a yellow slicker and rain boots as he hoses down the sidewalk. There is obviously something so noxious on the pavement that he cannot wait a few minutes for the rain to wash it away. He would prefer to stand in the downpour with a hose to expedite the process.

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12.23.03 WORD OF THE DAY
When we travel, I've started to take my own teabags along so I'm not stuck with Lipton when the hotel room offers hot water. On our honeymoon, I took ginger peach tea along. I was having a cup recently and suddenly I felt like I was on our hotel patio in Malaysia. I could practically hear the ocean.

What I like about the word "redolent" is that it's a perfect expression of the relationship between smells and memory. It means:

1. Having or emitting fragrance; aromatic.
2. Reminiscent; suggestive

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12.23.03 ON THE PAYROLL
A while back, I was reading a Salon article about how Iraqis were surprised that Saddam didn't fight back when the troops found him. The article quoted a man who is employed by U.S. troops as a security guard. He said of Saddam's capture, "We lost our only hope and now we are stuck with the Americans." So that's comforting.

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12.19.03 PRESIDENTIAL
In the past, I've tried to remain detached in the primaries. Once I choose a candidate I like, I tend to be fiercely loyal. If that person doesn't win the nomination, I feel like a traitor when I ultimately vote for the other guy.

I spent last weekend helping Bryan with the Howard Dean campaign. He did site advance work, and I was the advance person for the hotel, which means that I missed the concert and Dean's speech because I was watching the press core's luggage. Though I learned very little about Dean himself, I'm hoping he gets the nomination simply because I shook his hand in a parking garage at 6 a.m. after collating his press briefing. That makes for a lame anecdote if doesn't get elected.

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12.12.03 NEW WORD
Ataxia: Loss of the ability to coordinate muscular movement.

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12.10.03 AGAIN WITH THE ESQUIRE
More good stuff from "What I've Learned:"
Bob Lutz says, "Being able to "think outside the box" presupposes you were able to think in it. "

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YOU SPIN ME RIGHT ROUND
Last weekend, a little group of us went to see the Dance Along Nutcracker. It was exactly as it sounds: hundreds of little girls in fairy-princess costumes, and dozens of drag queens who had the same idea. Tutu rentals were $5 and worth every penny. There were toy soliders, and mice, and many a sugarplum fairy. There was also a woman who, inexplicably, took a length of pink tulle and tied a toy lamb to her head.

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12.09.03 CHECKING IN
In this month's Esquire, Muhammad Ali says, "What you're thinking is what you're becoming." When I shared this quote with Leslie she responded, "That's chilling." I'd have to agree. It's about time to ponder the works of Mother Theresa. Or a Britney Spears video. We all have our own aspirations.

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12.04.03 VOICES
From "Pange Lingua" by Thomas Lynch:

This is the voice I talk to myself in.
The one that says, before I fall asleep,
the children will all grow up and outlive me;
my mother's tumor will be benign;
the women who loved me will always love me.


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BOURBON CHERRIES
For those of you who also have surplus maraschino cherries on your hands, Stace Dayment had a good tip for me:

"Dump out liquid and save for drinks/Shirley Temples. Fill back up with bourbon. Put in fridge until the next big party. Make frou-frou desserts with those cherries on top or, just serve the cherries alone."

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LEAVING A LITTLE SOMETHING
I was fast-forwarding through commercials the other day (thanks TiVo!) when I caught a nanosecond of a woman pole dancing. What the...? I stopped; rewound. Turns out it was a cheesy commercial for Centerfolds, a local strip joint. There were dozens of taut women pouting, gyrating, and otherwise seducing the home video camera. Their slogan, "Absolutely nothing is left to the imagination," made me wonder when that became a selling point.

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12.03.03 I'D RATHER BE
We pause at a stoplight behind a car that has an enormous fish decal covering most of the back window.

Me: That guy loves fishin'.
B: He likes, killin' 'em, cookin' 'em, and stickin' them on the back of his SUV.
Me: Where did he get that? Who thought, "You know what would be a big seller? A 3-foot-wide Rainbow Trout decal."
B: Are you kidding? You've spent too much time in California. People have all kinds of shit like that on their cars.
Me: Is that true? Many people have large animal decals in their back windows?
B: Sure.
Me: Oh, America.
B: That's why other countries are so jealous of us.
Me: The 3-foot fish decals?
B: The fish paraphernalia of all kinds. Fish decals, wooden fish models, fish oil paintings, great big beach towels with fish printed on them.
Me: Take that, world!

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12.02.03 CULTURAL TUESDAYS
The San Francisco Museum of Modern Art has free admission on the first Tuesday of every month. This is your chance to see a lot of little kids in an overtly adult environment and overhear great stuff like, "MOM? That's enough of my museum." Right now, they're having a photography exhibit by Diane Arbus. These are a few of my favorite photos:

Untitled (6): The best thing about this picture is the way the little girl on the right is cracking up.

Girl in a Shiny Dress: This woman has a lovely collarbone.

Masked Woman in a Wheelchair: This reminds me of my friend, Alli.

Boy with a Straw Hat Waiting to March in a Pro-War Parade: If you look closely at the smaller button on his lapel, it reads, "Bomb Hanoi."

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11.29.03 PIE
Last year, I pulled a list out of San Francisco Magazine, "125 Very Best Things to Eat in the Bay Area." I recently came across it again and decided it was about time we started working our way through. In that spirit, we grabbed a couple of friends and headed an hour and a half south to Pescadero for Olallieberry pie at Duarte's Tavern. Pie, we learned, is a superior theme for Saturday night. We also learned that if you're looking for some post-meal protein to accentuate your pie and ice cream dinner, don't go with the oysters.

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TRIVIA AT SADIE'S FLYING ELEPHANT
Tej: How many calories does water have?
Laura: Zero.
Me: Yeah, zero, right?
Bryan: I thought it had something.
T: Me too.
M: From what?
B: The minerals.
L: And all that butter.

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11.28.03 WHEN REAL GOLF IS TOO TAXING
At the back of the bar there's a group of five men in their thirties, most of them are wearing plaid. They are crowded around a video-game console pounding at the air and yelling things like, "BITE! Bitebitebitebitebite." "AIRMAIL, Budddiiiie! " I walk past them on my way to the bathroom and glance at the screen. Video Golf is just about the whitest thing the world's got going.

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11.27.03 THANKFUL
This man is standing barefoot in the gutter of a busy street wearing his white terrycloth bathrobe. He has not come out to retrieve the paper, or turn off the sprinklers, or check his mail. He's come out to enjoy this fine Thanksgiving Day and watch the cars go by. He spits, takes a drag of his cigarette, and sighs contentedly.

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ADVICE
When you're discussing the wedding over Thanksgiving turkey with your grandparents, skip the part about the two straight chicks who made out on the dance floor.

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