Mighty Girl
My face.


contact: maggie at mightygirl dot net

Favorite Posts
Archives
About
Racy Shirts for Sale
Subscribe to my feed


You'll also find me here:
Mighty Goods
My Photos on Flickr
ReadyMade Magazine Blog
The Morning News

I read:
Bryan Mason
Alice
Heather Armstrong
Matthew Baldwin
Sarah Brown
Heather Champ
Matt Haughey
Eden Kennedy
Jason Kottke
Lori
Megan
Merlin Mann's 5ives
Obscure Store and Reading Room
Post Secret
Andrea Scher
Melissa Summers
Evany Thomas

2.25.04 THINKING IT OVER
A group of us are at a bar celebrating. A stranger approaches with a drink in each hand and says, "Are you the soup and mayo pigs?" The best part is how we look at each other questioningly. Are we the soup and mayo pigs?

link to this post



2.24.04 THE PEN VS. THE SWORD
On the bathroom wall of this SOMA coffee shop, someone has scrawled, "I have a boner that could hit a homer." I find this intriguing because the gentleman in question most likely wasn't drunk, and yet he felt compelled to share. I myself have never put pen to plaster, because I can never think of anything worthwhile to say. Perhaps if I had a penis.

link to this post



2.24.04 EMAIL MOMENT
A heartening note from Rosecrans:

Going to the butcher, I buy a paper and read it in the park on Saturday morning because it's so nice out. Little girl and her mother sit down next to me with a plastic bag from a bagel store. Mom answers her cell phone. Little girl picks up the bagel bag, says fondly, "Bag...I love you."

link to this post



2.23.04 BRAIN TO ARM
As we're leaving a restaurant, a well-dressed gentleman and his wife block the door. He's helping his wife with her coat, but when he finishes, he just stands there with his hand on the door.

R: Excuse me.
(Gentleman turns and blinks at her slowly.)
R: Excuse me?
(Gentleman may have had one too many mojiotos over dinner. R moves his hand from the door and opens it so we can leave.)
M: He was looped.
R: Yeah, that was weird. He obviously heard me.
M: He just wasn't sure what to do about it.
R: Brain to arm. Come in arm.
B: This is arm, over.
M: I need you to move the door.
B: (drunken slur) Don't you tell meee what to do. Why are you alwaysh telling me what to do?
R: Exactly. "I'm not gonna move the door. In fact, I'm gonna give this woman the finger!"
M: So that's how that works.

link to this post



2.20.04 CATCHING UP
For the past few years, I've read almost no books because I subscribe to so many magazines. Right now, I'm getting:

Real Simple
O, the Oprah Magazine
Martha Stewart Living
Esquire
Vogue
Lucky
Dwell
The New Yorker
The Smithsonian
Time

Jason Kottke recently embarked on a campaign to read more magazines, and he got a surprisingly long list of suggestions from his readers. Look it over and see what appeals to you. Scanning it, I realized it's been way too long since I've picked up copies of Giant Robot, Readymade, or The Believer. Then again, I've been meaning to finish Cry, the Beloved Country, The Lost Contient, and Midnight's Children for quite a while too. I could use a few weeks on the beach.

link to this post



2.18.04 OVERHEARD: ENCOURAGEMENT ON THE FULTON-5
Scenario: A pushy man gets on the bus with a cart too big for the aisle. He stands just next to the bus driver. The driver tells him to move, so he shuffles back about a foot and stands with his cart in front of an older woman. She expresses concern; he ignores her; she reiterates. All the dialogue below is hers:

You can't stand here.
(Pause)
You're in people's way.
(Pause)
I said you're in people's way!
(The bus driver tells the man to find a place to sit down. The man shuffles back a bit more.)
(Victorious now.) You hear him? That's it.
Keep movin'.
You're doin' fine.
Keeeeep movin'.

link to this post



2.17.04 FAMILY
A: When I was a kid and we played imaginary games, I was always the boss. If we played house, I was the mom. Or if we played work, I was the boss. I was such a brat. I used to always fight with this one neighborhood kid over who got to be mom. Mark Smith, remember him?
M: Oh, yeah!
A: He came out of the closet a few years ago. His mom was crushed. The rest of us were like, "Surprise."
M: Ha!
A: Really no one wanted to play Dad, except my little brother. Dad was so boring. We'd just give him a briefcase and say, "Go to work now." And he'd have to march off into some back room and play by himself for awhile.
M: Oh! That's sad.
A: Yeah, he'd leave for a minute and then come back and be like, "OK. Work's over!" So he'd pretend to read the newspaper.

link to this post



2.16.04 BRIGHT
Great insight into comedy by Billy Connolly from an article in the New Yorker:

"It's not because you've said something terribly funny; it's because you've reminded them of something very bright in their lives, because you're so passionate about telling them this tiny thing. It's a girl you love, it's fly-tying, it's a banjo--all the things that make you want to dance."

link to this post



2.13.04 INSPIRATION
These photographs by Loretta Lux are more like paintings. They're breathtaking. (via Superhero)

link to this post



2.13.04 YOU CHARMER, YOU
"If you ever get mauled by bears, I hope they stay away from your face, because I think you're cute."


Down load some Valentines.

link to this post



2.12.04 DOING GOOD
I have a new article up at The Morning News called Ten Bucks? Ten Charities. Go pick a worthy cause and show some love.

link to this post



2.11.04 DAWG
This young man is strutting up the street with his boom box. He's a big guy with a shaved head, sporting new sneakers and a parka. Suddenly he stops, looks behind him at ground level and gives a c'mon jerk of his head. Out of the crowd hurries a tiny Chihuahua. The dog rushes to the young man's side and then sits nervously at his feet. The man pauses a moment, then resumes strutting.

link to this post



2.10.04 OPEN UP
Bryan and I went on a drive this weekend, and wound up behind a minivan with a bumper sticker that read, "If only closed minds came with closed mouths."

Me: I'm so open-minded that I don't want to hear any opposing opinions.
B: If you're not open-minded, shut-the f**k up.
Me: Muteness upon those who disagree with me.

link to this post



2.9.04 SPEAK AND SPELL?
Bryan's cell phone has one of those rings that make people stop and look in the street. It's sort of a loud, futuristic, rolling chime. At my sister's house, his phone rings and the kids sit bolt upright with wide eyes. Trevor says, "We don't have any toys that sound like that!"

link to this post



2.6.04 OPEN LETTER
Dear guy in the cape and oversized beret who is nowhere near a Renaissance Faire,

Why are you doing this to yourself?

Sincerely,
Maggie

link to this post



2.5.04 ANTIHEROS
B: Did you just call her boobs "the villains?"
T: What? No! I said, "If you're willing."
Me: I'm totally calling my boobs the villains from now on. McNeil and Lehrer is getting tired.

link to this post



2.4.04 TELL ME BABY
After a long day of copyediting:

Who's zoomin' who, Bryan?
What?
Who's zooooomin' whoooo.
You've had enough tea.
I'm not caffeinated, I'm joyous.
OK.
Who's zooOOOOOmin' whooooo!
OK, that's annoying.
You're right, maybe I should have a glass of wine before we go out.
No way. Then you'll be amped and uninhibited.
Tell me, baby. Tell me, baby!

link to this post



2.3.04 OVERHEARD: WORRIES ON THE FILLMORE 22
Scenario: An older man in a fedora has a brief conversation with a tipsy woman who boards and sits next to him.

Him: How you doin' tonight?
Her: Not so good.
-What's wrong baby?
-You know, you know, everything just out of control.
-What you mean?
-You hear about these boys? These boys gettin' killed every day. Twenty of 'em.
-What you talkin' about?
-These boys on the bus, all of them killed.
-This happen today?
-No! No, long time ago.
-Well, ain't nothin' you can do 'bout that.
-I cain't hardly figure myself out over it.
-You can't let that get you down, baby. You got to move on.
-I know, but I got so many worries.
-You got to pick your worries.
-Yeah. How you gonna choose, they all over the place like that?
-Listen, why don't we go get ourselves a beer or somethin'?
-Baby, will you come home with me tonight and keep my company?
-We can talk about that.
-Yeah? Help me out, baby.
-Well, we can talk about it.
-Yeah...
-That sounds very interesting to me, you know?
-Help me out, baby.
-Long as it ain't gonna be no problem.
-No. No problem.
-That sounds very interesting to me.

link to this post



2.03.04 INTERPRETATIONS
Driving along, Jeff and I note a vanity plate on the car in front of us:

Jeff: AGENT XXX
Me: Stripper car.
Jeff: "I do porn for the government."

link to this post



2.3.04 TODAY
The plum trees are in bloom.

link to this post



Powered by Blogger